Saturday, July 31, 2010

Breaking Dawn... I just don't understand

So recently I'd got addicted to watching a bunch of web series on Youtube, like "Little White Lie" and "I Heart Vampires". One day, I saw this web series that made a reference to "Breaking Dawn" by Stephenie Meyer, involving Jacob Black and Renesmee

I then wanted to blog about that same thing, because when I read "Breaking Dawn" a long time ago (before my blog), I had the same opinion.

Even though I'm a guy, I rather like the Twilight saga, although I'm not much of a fan of Bella. When it comes to vampires, I like female main characters to be more like Buffy. Someone who can kick ass, but can still be vulnerable enough to rely on her friends when there's trouble.

Anyway, there are a few things in the Twilight saga that I eventually understood. But there is one thing that I will never ever understand.

In "Breaking Dawn" there is this scene where Jacob falls in love with his soul mate, the one who he will spend the rest of his life with, the love of his life. And that person is Renesmee, a half human and half vampire. Usually that's okay and all. It's very romantic. But Renesmee is a... baby.

Doesn't anyone else think that that's a little disturbing.

It would be like me (for some inexplicable reason) being in a maternity ward and catching sight of one of the babies there, then saying, "she is the one. That baby girl is the person I'm going to spend the rest of my life with." I don't know about you, but I find that disturbing on so many levels. But of course, it's okay for Jacob to fall in love with a baby because he is a werewolf. But if a human were to do that... can anyone say pedophile.

I just don't understand. And I don't think I ever will.

P.S. -- I actually looked this up a long time ago when I read "Breaking Dawn". Renesmee is half human and half vampire. There is actually a word for that. She's what is known as a Dhampir.

Hmm.... I might write a novel about a Dhampir someday. Maybe.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Paper Towns ... in your pants

I've just finished reading "Paper Towns", a YA novel by John Green (one of the vlogbrothers and co-creator of the Nerdfighters).

This books is awesome! It's so awesome that they originally made two covers for the same book when it was first published.

The novel is about this guy, Quentin Jacobsen, who is in love with his next door neighbor, the super unattainable Margo Roth Spiegelman.

But one night, she comes back into his life by climbing through his window, and then convinces him to go on a night filled journey of pranks and adventure. The next day, she disappears, and it's up to Quentin and his friends to go and find her.

On this search, Quentin begins to discover who the true Margo really is. He begins to see that his version of Margo isn't like the one in reality. Margo is a mystery, and it's up to Quentin to solve the mystery if he is going to find her (of course, this search includes a life changing road trip).

So, if you like novels that have depth to them, mixed in with hilarious brilliance, then this is the book for you. Seriously, this novel has everything, including being naked under your graduation robes, peeing in beer bottles, a car accident involving a cow, a rumor about chronic masturbation causing blood to appear in your urine (although it was just a kidney infection), the largest collection of black Santas in the world, etc...

Read this book. It's awesome!

Hoping that you'll like this book,

John Smith

P.S. -- !Nerdfighters!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Don't talk about your novel!

What are writers? My definition of a writer is a person who has stories that they want to tell other people. Essentially, writers are storytellers (in paperback or hardcover form).

(*Of course, writers should only write stories that they themselves enjoy. But if other people enjoy their stories also, then that's good too).

However, writers tell their stories through novels, and so they have to write those novels. That is why writers shouldn't talk about their novels. Why? Because if writers talk about their novels, they lose the urge to actually write the novel itself.

Here's an example: Let's say that there is this guy (an aspiring writer) who has a story for a novel in his head. Like any writer, he wants to talk to people about this story. So he tells his friends about what happens in the novel; who dies and lives, the evil guy, who falls in love, the exotic places, the twist ending, etc.... Then by the time he sits down to actually write his story into a novel, he loses the urge to touch the keyboard or hold a pen. Why? Because he already told the story.

Writers, once they have a story idea in their head, have an urge to tell that story. And unlike storytellers around a campfire, writers tell their story through novels. So if a writer tells his friends about the story, the subconscious mind of the writer is telling him that he already told his story, so he doesn't need to write a novel to tell his story anymore. So he loses the urge to write.

That is why you shouldn't talk about your novel!

You don't see me talking about my novel or blog about it (okay, I used to do this, but I stopped. From personal experience, I know what it's like to want to tell your story and then lose the urge to write it).

So I apologize to those who support me and my novel, and yet don't know what my novel is about. I only ask that you be patient with me. I will write and publish a novel someday (maybe in a year), and I promise you that you'll enjoy it.

Thanks to all who support me,

John Smith

PS: If you do talk about your novel (which you shouldn't), you should limit it to only one vague sentence:

(*My novel is not a romance and it doesn't have vampires, but it does have a werewolf).

My profile picture is an obvious hint...

I'm sorry, that is all I'm going to tell you about my novel... for now.

Monday, July 26, 2010

What kind of name is Hermione?

If any of you have been reading my blog, you'll know that I'm a fan of Harry Potter (best books in the world!). So, I kind of pay attention to the things in the Harry Potter fandom, like Wizard Rock. For any of you who don't know, Wizard Rock is a group of different bands that create songs involving anything related to Harry Potter.

This video involves one of those bands, known as "The Parselmouths" ft. Nerimon on guitar. So if you're a fan of Harry Potter, or you just like great music, watch this video. It's awesome!

*This song is slightly insulting to Hermione, so if any of you are fans of her, you better know how to take a joke.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Let the seed grow!

In a dark and stormy night... sitting in front of the computer, an idea struck you like lighting. It's not just any old idea, it's the idea for the greatest novel in the world. It's so great that you've got to write it down now! .....


When you've got an idea for a novel, you don't just write it down immediately. You've got to wait and let it grow. Like a seed, you've got to nurture it and take care of it, until given enough of time, it will sprout into a full novel idea.

I believe that once you're struck with an idea for a novel, you have to wait at least six months, before you start working on the novel. Because within that time, your idea will grow and stretch and do the hokey-pokey in your mind. When that happens, the idea will become something even more amazing.

I should know, because the novel I'm writing was pretty much a generic idea when it started out. Now, 5 years later (yes, I've been letting the novel idea grow in my mind for 5 years. And yes, I was procrastinating), my novel idea has grown into something more awesome.

So when you're struck with an idea for a novel, you shouldn't just jump into it right away. You should let it sit in your mind for a minimum of six months. During those six months, you should write down the random ideas that come to you, which can add more depth to your novel. After that, outline those random ideas and then turn it into a novel (I know not every writer outlines his novel before he writes it, but I'm the kind of writer that likes to outline his ideas).

I hope this post was helpful to all you writers out there,

John Smith

P.S. -- Letting the novel idea grow in your head shouldn't be an excuse for you to just sit there and procrastinate. Even though I'm guilty of this, that doesn't mean that you should be too. So at the end of those six months, start writing!

Saturday, July 17, 2010

If I Become A Famous Author....

I recently watched a vlog by Kaleb Nation. He tells us the 5 things that he would do when he becomes a famous author.

So, I'm also going to tell you the 5 things that I would do when I become a famous author:

1) One of my novels will become a movie (the director and screenwriter of "Eragon" will stay far away from it).

2) Get a pet chinchilla, or a hedgehog, or a ferret, or a bloodhound dog, ..... and then I will call him "Watson".

3) Meet other famous authors, such as: JK Rowling, Kaleb Nation, Stephen King, Neil Gaiman, Stephenie Meyer, Eoin Colfer, Suzanne Collins, DJ Machale, Garth Nix, etc.... and a bunch more.

4) Write an episode for Doctor Who (after I learn how to write a script).

5) Ask for permission to write the next book for "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" series, and work extremely hard on the book, because Eoin Colfer did a sort of good job, but I think it could have been better.

That's pretty much it. Those are the 5 things that I want to do once I become a famous author. If you guys become a famous author, what are the 5 things that you would like to do?

Friday, July 16, 2010

What is the answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything?

The answer is....... 42

Wow, that was wise and anticlimatic at the same time.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy 'trilogy' by Douglas Adams

Thursday, July 15, 2010

My twitter account is back! Yay!

I just got an email today that said that they reinstated my twitter account! Yay!

I'm alive and not suspended! (Happy Dance!)

But I'm going to promise myself not to go on twitter constantly, or I'll just get addicted again.

Time to go work on my novel.

Thanks to the people who work for twitter,

John Smith

P.S. -- Follow me on twitter! Please? I'll be your best friend!

There is a 99.9% chance that the Character won't die, but...

There are many novels out there that manage to put us on the edge of our seats.

I don't really understand how they do this. In novels, there is a main character. Most of the time, like 99.9% (non-accurate percentage), the main character lives on after the end of the novel. Every reader knows this. However, how is it that the author manages to write the novels in such a way that we, the reader, believe that the main character might die.

Let's use Harry Potter by JK Rowling as an example: Harry Potter is the main character. From the very first pages, we know that Harry Potter won't die. He'll live on after the seventh book has ended. He might get injured and hurt along the way, but he won't die. Let's face it, if JK Rowling killed off Harry Potter in the middle of the story, everyone (including Rowling herself) will be like "I hate you forever, JK Rowling."

So knowing that Harry Potter will continue to live, how is it that JK Rowling and other skilled authors can make it seem like their main character is going to die. We read about how they put their main characters in dangerous situations against powerful enemies, but instead of going, "Don't worry, he'll live", we're more like "please don't die, please don't die, ....." when we read that scene in the novel.

Can someone explain to me how these authors can do that? I know it has something to do with suspense and stuff, but I don't fully comprehend the technique involved. How is it that those authors can reach into the .1% and make us think, even for a second, that the main character is going to die?

If you've read this post expecting an answer from me, you looked in the wrong place. Although I do hope to someday understand the method, right now, I'm still incompetent.

Sorry for the lame post. I'm just typing this, hoping an answer will come to me. Or maybe one of you guys may know the answer and help me out.

Thanks to all my readers,

John Smith

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Who do you write like?

I subscribe to this awesome blog, Cafe of Dreams. And today, there was this fantastic post on that blog. This post had a link that gets you to this site, which can analyze your writing and tell you who you write like. When I tried it, I pasted one page of my horror short story on the site, and it analyzed by story. Guess who it says I write like.

I write like
Stephen King

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

Yay! That just made my future look brighter. I'm going to go now and work extra hard on my writing!

Who do you write like?

Twitter account suspended!

For awhile now, I've been addicted to Twitter. But guess what? My Twitter account was SUSPENDED!

I've been using twitter for awhile now, trying to get friends and followers, trying to build a platform of people who would be interested in my novel and stories. So you can imagine how stunned I was when I lost contact with all those people. At first, I was really angry and desparate to get my twitter account back.

But then I realized that this is a good thing (even though I lost hundreds of followers). I was really addicted to twitter. And if you're a writer, that's a bad thing. The blue bird lures you away from your novel, and then weaves a spell of procrastination over you. But now that blue bird is gone, and I can get back to writing. Yay!

Time to get to work.



....Hey look, someone became my new friend on Facebook. I'll just pop over to that site for a few seconds before I get started writing.

P.S. - If I don't get back my old twitter account, I'll just make another one AFTER I finish writing a book.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Ways to overcome writers block

You're writing your novel and it's coming along great. You type along, fingers flying over the keyboard. But then, it comes out of nowhere... the monster that every writer fears. "Oh no! It's Writer's Block!"

It's coming at you, with its giant stinger ready to paralyze your brain with its neurotoxic chemical, preventing your mind from coming up with new creative ideas. So what can writers do when the monster comes at you. What defenses can writers carry to overcome such a mind numbing attack.

Do not worry, for I am here to load you with my armory of anti-writer's block weapons:

1) Keep on writing your novel and plow through writer's block. If you force out ideas for your novel, you might just be able to force the mind numbing stingers away, which will allow your novel ideas to eventually flow out freely (This rarely works, but try it anyway). Don't think about it, just write and plow on.

2) Write anything. When writer's block hits, try writing other things instead of your novel. Try writing some short stories or poems. Thinking up and writing new stories might spark the creative juices in your brain to think up new things for your novel.

3) Go for a run, or do some sports, or any physical activity that will burn you to exhaustion. Doing all these things will create a spark inside your body. Physical activity pumps chemicals like adrenaline, endorphins, and who knows what else, all throughout your body. All of your body's natural chemicals will rage a war with each other, until they ignite a spark of inspiration that will blow the monster away.

4) Take a break. Go watch a movie, or read my blog, or listen to music, or just sit on a park bench and go people watching. You can even do nothing and just fall asleep. Sometimes all you can do is to distract yourself from the mind numbing stingers and wait for their effects to go away.

5) Run away to another place. Sometimes you just have to run from the writer's block monster. So run away to another place and write. Sometimes changing your surroundings by going to a different place can help (make sure it's a place where you can concentrate on your writing).

6) Drink Coffee. Something as simple as a cup of coffee (caffeine) is the solution to fight off the writer's block monster's mind numbing attacks.

7) Deny everything. Close your eyes and deny that the writer's block monster even exists (I don't think this works at all, but try it if all else fails).

These are only some of the things you can do to defend yourself against writer's block. So if you're a writer, you should no longer fear the moment when writer's block will creep up on you and sting your brain.

*These anti-writer's block weapons don't always work. So prepare for the mind numbing stingers.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Guest Post for Jane Friedman

Hey there blog readers,

I just wrote a guest post for Jane Friedman, who works for Writer's Digest. The post is about using poetry techniques to help write your novel.

Check it out here.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Short Stories: A way to overcome Writer's Block

Hey there blog readers,

I'm sorry to say this, but I've got writer's block. So I've been putting my novel on hold for quite awhile. I want to finish my novel, but I can't. The ideas are just not firing in my head. I want to write, yet I can't write my novel.

So I'm going to write some short stories instead.

Just because I can't work on my novel doesn't mean I have to stop writing. I've had a few short story ideas backed up in my head for quite a long while now, but I never got the chance to write them.

So I decided to write short stories as a way to overcome writer's block. By doing this, I've discovered many benefits from writing short stories during my writer's block:

Productivity - I'm going to eventually write and publish these short stories one day, so why not just write them now while my writer's block prevents me from writing my novel. I'm not going to just sit around waiting for my writer's block to end.

Passion - When you spend months staring at the same novel and the same characters, the story begins to look a little dull to you. So if you spend some time away from your novel and work on something new, then by the time you start working on your novel again, you will work at it with a renewed passion.

Creativity - When you continue to write (even if it's not your novel), you can keep your creative juices flowing and stop the right side of your brain from building up cobwebs. Then by the time you're inspired again to continue on your novel, the ideas will explode out of your fingers. You'll be lucky if your keyboard doesn't catch on fire.

Jump Start - Your creative brain is not firing on all cylinders, so maybe if you write short stories, it will jump start those creative cylinders so that it will reconnect your creativity back to your novel. The ideas that fuel your novel will come back quicker and you'll overcome writer's block much faster than simply waiting around for it to end.

These are just some of the benefits that I've discovered while writing my short stories. Of course, you don't have to write short stories to overcome writer's block. There are many ways to get rid of writer's block, and different ways work for different people.

I'm the kind of person that loves to write and I've got some story ideas that needs to be written down. So this method of overcoming writer's block will work best for me, and that's why I'm blogging about it.

On a final note: It doesn't have to be short stories. You can try writing poems, or flash fiction, or even a comedy sketch, if you want to overcome your writer's block.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Happy 4th of July!!!

Happy Independence Day everybody!!!

I'm going to take a break from writing today, then go see the fireworks at night.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Tips to get Novel Ideas

Here are a few simple tips on how to get novel ideas:

-Sleep a lot. You can only dream when you're asleep

-Go outside and experience the world. You'll probably get hit with something sooner or later

-If you're lazy, then just daydream. You've got nothing else to do

-Talk to a lot of people (or animals, or maybe even inanimate objects)

-Listen to a lot of music or watch a lot of movies

-Try doing some of those writing prompts

-Go on Google Images and just look at a bunch of random pictures

-Remember the words, "What if..."

-Go people watching

Well that's it. Hope you'll think of a great idea for a novel!

Friday, July 2, 2010

The First Step: Light Bulb!

What is the first step for writing a novel?

It's an idea, of course!

To start a novel, you first need an idea. A spark of inspiration, a seed planted in the soil, a light bulb to brighten up the usual dull cobwebs in your brain. Call it what you will, but you need that idea.

But where do ideas come from? I have absolutely no clue. Some theories say that ideas come from your dreams. Others say it comes from the jumble of thoughts in your head mutating into an idea. While the rest of them say that ideas are inspired by your Muse (mine's on vacation right now).

Wherever they come from, once you have that idea, you have taken the first step on starting your novel.

Hope you'll have some great ideas for a novel